Friday, October 29, 2004

Whats That about?

Seems that when you are in a relationship for the long term be it gay or straight there are certain things that happen. A. You age. B. You grow comfortable with the other person to a fault. C. One partner wants to have outside friends to go out with and not always necessarily include YOU in their plans with the new friend.
This poses several problems. A. You feel left out. B. The partner that goes out is having a good time and YOU are left at home. C. If you say anything TO him you are perceived as being jealous. D. If YOU decide to go out and make friends, then your other half will feel you are trying to get back at him for it and end up going out even more.
The question then becomes what CAN you do? A. Live your life walking on eggshells trying to act as if nothing is happening and resenting him for leaving you alone. B. Pretend NOTHING is happening and stay at home. C. Live your life for yourself and realize you aren't joined at the hip and go make your own friends.
I guess that you have no control over anything else or anyone else. IF the guy knowingly asks out one partner to the movies because he has only ONE extra ticket and knowingly leaves out the other one..and that person invited doesnt see anything wrong with leaving his partner at home, then the partner whos left at home needs to go out and get his own friends; not to get even but to find a life for himself outside the relationship. One has to cover his own ass and not become a victim of circumstance. One cannot be made to feel victimized unless one relinquishes THAT power to someone else. Relationships come and go but you are the only one who has to look at yourself in the mirror every day and not only deal with what you see, BUT be happy with who you are and how you choose to deal WITH and live life...


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